"A few years ago, I would have dropped everything I was doing and would have spent hours trying to explain my point of view to someone who confronted me...
You see, in those days, I not only still wanted to please everyone, but I also still thought it was possible to please everyone if I just wrote hard enough and made myself clear enough.
I hadn't yet learned that some individuals aren't as open-minded as others, and that some people are so entrenched in their points of view that no matter what you say to them you can't move them off the hard rock on which they stand.
Of course, the letter I spent hours writing might or might not be read with any degree of attention, but you can be sure a response would be forthcoming that would require more thought and more writing, and this might continue for days.
A classic energy sink.
Was anything gained by a dialogue like this?
No, not really, since both parties had points of view they considered the correct one.
Was anything lost by a dialogue like this?
Yes, hours and hours of time and energy that would have done more good had both of us involved in the energy sink used that time and energy for something other than to argue our particular point of view.
...But do I reject what all energy sink letters say?
Not at all, and this is an important point for learning to deal with energy sinks.
By not engaging in the energy sink, you save valuable time and nerve power; but by ignoring what the person had to say, you may miss a possible opportunity for growth."
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Chet Day's Natural Health Circus: Energy Sinks:
Posted by Rob Pugh at Thursday, January 12, 2006