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| From 2009-07-04 |
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| From 2009-07-04 |
"In a stunning announcement whose shockwaves will likely reverberate from Alaska's state capitol to the Beltway politics of Washington, D.C., Gov. Sarah Palin said Friday morning that she will resign her office July 26."
"A Turkish game show is challenging atheists to reassess their views and win “the biggest prize ever”. Penitents Compete will bring together an Islamic imam, a Jewish rabbi, a Buddhist monk and a Greek Orthodox priest seeking to convert the atheists. The prize for any converted contestants is an expenses-paid pilgrimage to a holy site of their chosen faith.
...The imam, rabbi, monk and priest will then seek to persuade the atheists of the merits and truth of their faith.
Adverts for the show promise: “We give you the biggest prize ever; we represent the belief in God. Believe, repent, God will forgive you.”"
Tyler Durden: I want you to hit me as hard as you can.
Narrator: What?… in the face?
Tyler Durden: Surprise me.
Narrator: This is so fucking stupid. Well, what do you want me to do? You just want me to hit you?
Tyler Durden: C’mon, do me this one favor.
Narrator: Why?
Tyler Durden: Why? I don’t know why; I don’t know. Never been in a fight. You?
Narrator: No, but that’s a good thing.
Tyler Durden: No, it is not. How much can you know about yourself, you’ve never been in a fight? I don’t wanna die without any scars.
"Video. Adolf Hitler is pretty pissed off to learn that Michael Jackson has died and won't be able to perform at his birthday party. Evidences the true marks of a great internet meme: infinite expandability, extremely bad taste in multiple respects, and an unfairly long lifespan."
"Smoking scenester #1 to another, after seeing toy poodle: Hey, look, that must be one of them dumb city rat dogs.
Girl with poodle to smoking scenester #1: Hey, look, you must be one of those dumb bridge & tunnel cunts.
--11th & 1st"
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| From 2009-07-04 |
"Paul Abel says someone punched him while he was stopped at a red light. So he drove around the neighborhood trying to find the man. Abel, who'd been drinking, saw Kaleb Miller and thought he was the man who hit him, so he struck him on the back of the neck with his handgun. The gun went off, striking Miller on the hand. At trial, a judge declared Abel's actions "inappropriate, impudent and ill-advised," but acquitted him of aggravated assault, reckless endangerment, and DUI. Why? Abel was an off-duty cop, and he says he was trying to arrest Miller, who witnesses say wasn't the man who struck him. He says he had to use force when Miller refused to obey his commands."
"...The mother sometimes brings up the children with too much love."Why aren't the elderly offered seats? [...on the need for designated priority seats for the elderly on trains/buses. This was the most delightfully insane rant the author had in the book.]
"...there are many Japanese who do not offer their seats to the elderly. This can be particularly seen in the younger generation... The child expects to get a seat and becomes unmanageable when the expectation is not met. There are even people who offer their seats to these spoiled brats.
...Japanese parents also pamper their children by buying them nearly everything they ask for. Being raised spoiled, these self-centered children grow up feeling they have every right to be seated.
Also, the children of today are not as strong as before although they are built better. They are unable to stand for long periods of time. Japanese with sense frown at the sight of them sunk in a crouch along the roadside."
"Women love to dress up and there is a risk they would try to outdo one another if they were free to dress as they pleased. Using unnecessary energy on matters unrelated to work would be detrimental to the company..."Other genius insights, in response to a question about Japanese manzai/slapstick comedy:
"The United States places strict restrictions on violence and sex scenes, and Americans may find slapstick comedy... to be a little too violent."Um, no. You're an idiot. In general, and this is really my own personal opinion, I don't get manzai because the idea of having the tsukkomi constantly smack around the boke just because, really, he's dumb, comes across as more mean spirited than funny. Especially to the degree it's done. And, well, slapstick can be funny, but it's not clever. It's kind of "low" comedy. Not witty, not thought provoking, not deft. But the idea that it might be too violent for Americans, kings of ludicrous cinematic violence? That's just commmentary from somebody who's been buying into their own nonsense for too long.
"A British hard-partying 24-year-old bartender got upset that his elderly neighbour called the cops over all the noise he was making, so he got drunk and broke into the 72-year-old's house, wielding some kind of Mall Ninja knife that incorporated brass knuckles. What he didn't know was that the neighbour was a retired boxing champ, and the older man beat the everloving crap out of the would-be assailant.
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| From 2009-07-01 |
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| From 2009-07-01 |
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| From 2009-07-01 |
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| From 2009-07-01 |
"The Boulder Police Department is looking for a cross-dressing man wearing clown makeup who robbed a liquor store on Saturday night."
"Dressed in a low-cut pink shirt, tight black booty pants, and thick, plastic platform stilettos, Stephanie Babines doesn’t look the part of a political rabble-rouser.
Yet an activist is exactly what Babines became when her efforts to help women shape up through fully clothed, decidedly G-rated stripper-inspired aerobics ran afoul of overzealous officials in the small western Pennsylvania town of Mars. This unyieldingly perky 31-year-old entrepreneur, standing in the small forest of steel poles that shoot up from the floor of her mirrored dance and fitness studio, has taught dance-phobic authorities an expensive lesson in federal court..."
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| From 2009-06-28 |
"Top Ten Signs That You Are An Unquestioning Christian:
10- You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of your god.
9- You feel insulted and ‘dehumanized’ when scientists say that people evolved from lesser life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.
8- You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Trinity god.
7- Your face turns purple when you hear of the ‘atrocities’ attributed to Allah, but you don’t even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in ‘Exodus’ and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in ‘Joshua’—including women, children, and animals!
6- You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about god sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.
5- You are willing to spend your life looking for little loop-holes in the scientifically established age of the Earth (4.55 billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by pre-historic tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that the Earth is a couple of generations old!
4- You believe that the entire population of this planet wi th the exception of those who share your beliefs—though excluding those in all rival sects—will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet you consider your religion the most ‘tolerant’ and ‘loving’.
3- While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor, speaking in ‘tongues,’ may be all the evidence you need.
2- You define 0.01% as a “high success rate” when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.
1- You actually know a lot less than many Atheists and Agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history—but still call yourself a “Christian.”"
