"There is only getting up and doing it all over again, smarter and harder, until something ups and fucking kills you, because that’s the only thing big enough to stop you. This is The Great Work, and all you have to do is choose it, not look back and never fucking stop until you’re in your box, under the dirt and flowers are growing between your teeth. And that is why I’ll never be asked to do motivational speaking. G’night."
The world's a better place knowing there's an establishment called "Redneck Heaven." Redneck Heaven naked body-paint waitresses force Texas town to change nudity laws | Mail Online:
"A city in Texas has been forced to change its nudity laws after topless waitresses wearing just body paint served customers. Staff at the Red Neck Heaven Bar in Lewisville have been told they are no longer allowed to wear just body paint and strategically placed pasties covering their modesty. Until recently the girls at the restaurant would hold ABC days - anything but clothes."
Dennis Rodman makes everything better. Dennis Rodman Should Be In The Front Row of Every Fashion Show Ever - The Superficial - Because You're Ugly:
"For reasons I feel comfortable chalking up to divine intervention, Dennis Rodman was in the front row for Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week in Miami yesterday where not only was he drinking beer out of a can while wearing a leather vest and jogging pants, but standing up and pointing at the ass of each and every model as they walked by. "
"One of the worst myths Democratic partisans love to tell themselves - and everyone else - is that the GOP refuses to support President Obama no matter what he does. Like its close cousin - the massively deceitful inside-DC grievance that the two parties refuse to cooperate on anything - it's hard to overstate how false this Democratic myth is. When it comes to foreign policy, war, assassinations, drones, surveillance, secrecy, and civil liberties, President Obama's most stalwart, enthusiastic defenders are often found among the most radical precincts of the Republican Party."
"...a dozen years of disastrous occupations in Afghanistan and Iraq, a rough doubling of military expenditures in nominal dollars and ongoing demands for ever-greater spending, disclosures about massive covert government surveillance of U.S. citizens in America, and secret presidential kill lists really puts the hurt on whatever faith and trust folks once had in such institutions. "
"(810): Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great."
"No Doubt singer and wife of that other 90s musician from that band that nobody liked, Gwen Stefani, took her son, Zuma Rossdale, out for a stroll around Beverly Hills yesterday, and hopefully other 43-year old moms around the country took notice and issued DEFCON 1 on their own fitness routines. It’s totally unfair and borderline criminal that a mom of two is out running around looking like this while so many American men are sitting at home with wives who look more like Mama June than they do anything even remotely close to Gwen. Let’s try to get a few more bottles of Xenadrine in stockings this Christmas, fellas."
"If there’s anything Christians in America go gay for, it’s leaving shitty tips, and situations where they can pretend they’re a persecuted minority despite being the most predominant religion in the country that influences virtually every level of state, local and federal government. So imagine Kirk Cameron‘s glee when it looked like Facebook “banned” the trailer for his upcoming movie Unstoppable and not because it doesn’t have Denzel Washington driving a train. (I’ll nail to you a cross, Cameron!) Turns out the domain name Kirk’s production company bought for the movie used to host assloads of spam which naturally flagged it on Facebook’s end until they could clear it up. Which they did and even took the time to let The Christian Post (via FilmDrunk) know what happened because, amazingly, Facebook is in the business of attracting subscribers. Who saw that coming?"
Crocodile goes Crocodile. People are dumb. Man gets 30 stitches after being bitten on head by croc: "The crocodile trainer who survived a terrifying croc attack earlier this week spoke out for the first time about the near-death experience that left him with 30 stitches on his head. During a show that went horribly wrong at Samut Prakan Crocodile Farm and Zoo, the world’s biggest and Thailand’s oldest, a tourist filmed Prawit Seabmee, 27, being mauled by a croc. The amateur video, which went viral on social media, showed Prawit placing his head in a croc’s mouth as part of a stunt when, suddenly, the reptile snapped its jaws shut. Prawit told Channel 7 that he managed to pull his head out in time yet still sustained multiple bite wounds around his head. The croc trainer, who has performed with the animal for four months and over one hundred shows, said that this was the first mishap that had ever happened to him. Prawit insisted that he would return to do his beloved job after the recovery."
"Alfonso Cuaron's latest Gravity trailer will knock the wind right out of you. The simple two-minute clip — made entirely in one take — shows what happens when things fall apart for George Clooney and Sandra Bullock in space. It is simply stunning."
True Story, Bro. Anthony Weiner Schnitzel | Free The Animal:
"I don't want to spend any more than a few minutes on this because wives of politically powerful men are not worth it so far as I'm seeing and I'll tell you why. I've spent almost 20 years and have heard the very, very rare woman condemn Hillary Clinton for what wasn't, after all, a vast, long, hard right wing conspiracy. It was your husband's cock in Monica Lewinski's mouth in the oval office—which is totally fine, private, between all y'all. And hey, all I want Anthony to do is to be honest: "Hey, I like getting a hard on, tweeting a pic of it to some random woman of opportunity...and I want to be your Mayor, New York.""
"Hanners blew the whistle on the department’s tactics and was eventually fired for refusing to comply and keep quiet. He says that each officer was required to make 100 contacts each month, which included tickets, arrests, field interviews, and warnings. This equates to 72,000 contacts a year in a 50,000 person town. His claims are backed up by audio recordings of his superiors he made. The Auburn police department declined requests to be interviewed for this story. “There are not that many speeders, there are not that many people running red lights to get those numbers, so what [the police] do is they lower their standards,” says Hanners. That led to the department encouraging officers to arrest people that Hanners “didn’t feel like had broken the law.”"
"Former Reason staffer Radley Balko, now an investigative reporter for the Huffington Post and author of the new book, Rise of the Warrior Cop, says that this isn’t just a nuisance, it infringes on public safety. “You have a policy that encourages police to create petty crimes and ignore serious crimes, and that’s clearly the opposite of what we want our police to be doing,” says Balko. Hanners repeatedly voiced his concerns through his chain of command, and the department responded that these requirements are necessary for increasing productivity. Yet Hanners firmly believes that the quotas are entirely revenue driven."
Robert Anton Wilson Explains Quantum Physics | TDG - Science, Magick, Myth and History: "Remember, we invented the lines on the map. But quantum physics seems confusing because a lot of people think we didn't invent the lines, so it seems hard to understand how a particle can be in three places at the same time without being anywhere at all. But when you remember that we invented all the boundaries, borders and lines just like the Berlin Wall, then quantum mechanics is no more mysterious than the fact that I live in three places at the same time. ...Any model we make does not describe the Universe, it describes what our brains are capable of saying at this time.
We think this is reality. In philosophy that's called naive realism: 'what I perceive is reality'. And philosophers have refuted naive realism every century for the last 2500 years, starting with Buddha and Plato, and yet most people still act on the basis of naive realism. Now the argument is 'well maybe my perceptions are inaccurate, but somewhere there is accuracy - the scientists have it with their instruments; that's how we can find out what's really real'. But relativity and quantum mechanics have demonstrated clearly that what you find out with instruments is true relative only to the instrument you're using, and where that instrument is located in space-time. So there is no vantage point from which real reality can be seen; we're all looking from the point of view of our own reality tunnels.
And when we begin to realise that we're all looking from the point of view of our own reality tunnels, we find that it's much easier to understand where other people are coming from, or the ones who don't have the same reality tunnel as us do not seem ignorant or deliberately perverse or lying or hypnotised by some mad ideology. They just have a different reality tunnel, and every reality tunnel might tell us something interesting about our world, if we're willing to listen."