Headline of the day - "God Can Suck My Dick"

Worth it just for that, really.

Funny, funny diatribe.

Full article at the link.

eXile - Issue #128 - Feature Story - God Can Suck My Dick - By Matt Taibbi:

"...Despite what you may think, God people are not just incredibly stupid. They're dangerous. They make possible every kind of human idiocy. Why? Not just because they tend to be zealots who try to force their point of view on other people (indeed, most religions consider non-believers lost or damned); not just because they do things like level the World Trade Center or strap dynamite to themselves and walk into abortion clinics to kill teenage girls they don't even know...

...In any case, here are seven deadly ways you can do your part to depress God people as much as they depress you:

(1) Don't celebrate Christmas...

(2) Engage in pointlessly heated arguments with elderly Believers who are set in their ways.

...Engage in conversation with the elderly person and then gradually maneuver the discussion in the direction of God. It can be as crude as "Nice necklace. What, do you believe in God?" Then, when the answer comes in the affirmative, argue. Argue ruthlessly. Pose a difficult question: why is it necessary to terrify children with images of hell so early in life? Isn't that violent and cruel? Harp on issues like this, which are effective in the sense that it makes them, the harmless old person, feel in retrospect like the villain and think with regret that they might have been unkind to their children in their past, which is the only time which is real for them anyway. Never forget to bring up the Inquisition, the pogroms, the corruption of Jesus's message by the Catholic church, the debauchery of the Popes, the Ku Klux Klan... Make the blood rush out of their faces by introducing the topic of the sexual confusion the Christian attitude toward intimacy causes in almost all Western adults, who are trained to think of sex as something dirty and shameful. Say things like: "Religion teaches us that our natural curiosity about the opposite sex is perverted and shameful; but since these are natural urges, and the body will protest endlessly at its inclinations being repressed, a schism inevitably forms in the adult's personality, one that is never cured..."

(3) Convert the faithful.

They do it to you. Why can't you do it to them?...

(4) Inform small children that there is no God.

Gain legal access to children somehow. Depending on the scale you want to practice this technique on, you might want to get a job as a teacher or a coach... If you are blunt enough about how you tell them the truth, children will believe you, because children are smart. At the very least, they will be left with doubts, and doubts will be enough to do the trick...

(5) Do not allow priests or nuns into your home if they are in costume; do not socialize with priests or nuns in formal costume...

(6) Become a Jesus Freak.

The best way to turn people off to religion is to out-idiot them at their own idiotic game. In this case, become a Jesus freak of the early-1970s variety... People will start to question the fact that they believe in the same thing you do.

(7) Seduce Religious Women.

Once a woman is old enough to drink, her confidence suddenly plummets and she'll cling to anyone, or anything - whether it's Jesus or Ayn Rand. Find yourself a lonely religious girl and seduce her with all the charm (but not money) you can muster. Fuck her well, and lick her box for two hours. Then, once she starts clinging to you, tell her that you're not sure if you guys have a future because she believes in Jesus. Then kick back and watch as she uses her Bibles and crucifixes to warm the fire. Once that's done and you've completely shaken her faith, dump her and move on to the next one - preferably her fucked-up sister."