"I'd love to have that shallow, unquestioned belief." - Doug Stanhope.

Me, too. Didn't work for me though.

If Doug Stanhope were president - GQ Jokes - GQ.COM (UK):

"On beliefs
'Why do you believe it and what's your motivation for believing in it? I don't even believe in the s*** I say for a full 24 hours. I would love to have a consistent viewpoint of my own. It would be nice to have that solid, stiff head that said, 'Well, I'm a Democrat and that's because I believe, and my parents believe, that we should have some kind of social safety net.' They don't ever look at the flaws: you get her pregnant, you marry her. That's just what you do. I'd love to have that shallow, unquestioned belief.'

On Obama
'I thought he was cool to watch, on the same level that you'd say, 'Steve Buscemi, yeah, he's cool to watch.' The whole cool thing has just died. He's become boring. All the speeches are the same. He's just become the hack president.'"