Today's Internets - Louis C.K. channels Blaise Pascal.

NDGT wins at jury duty - "In 2002, having spent more than three years in one residence for the first time in my life, I got called for jury duty. I show up on time, ready to serve. When we get to the voir dire, the lawyer says to me, “I see you’re an astrophysicist. What’s that?” I answer, “Astrophysics is the laws of physics, applied to the universe—the Big Bang, black holes, that sort of thing.” Then he asks, “What do you teach at Princeton?” and I say, “I teach a class on the evaluation of evidence and the relative unreliability of eyewitness testimony.” Five minutes later, I’m on the street.

A few years later, jury duty again. The judge states that the defendant is charged with possession of 1,700 milligrams of cocaine. It was found on his body, he was arrested, and he is now on trial. This time, after the Q&A is over, the judge asks us whether there are any questions we’d like to ask the court, and I say, “Yes, Your Honor. Why did you say he was in possession of 1,700 milligrams of cocaine? That equals 1.7 grams. The ‘thousand’ cancels with the ‘milli-’ and you get 1.7 grams, which is less than the weight of a dime.” Again I’m out on the street." - Neil deGrasse Tyson

This guy is winning at raising kids/funny stuff - Batman trades crimefighting for childrearing with hilarious results:

"Some men just want to watch the kids learn (through a Batman mask). Men like Batdad, a heroic father who has been teaching his kids, scaring his poor wife, and entertaining countless people with his Vine videos, detailing his "unique" parenting style. You seriously don't want to miss this video."

Conspiracy Theories Abound After Navy Yard Shooting | Danger Room | Wired.com: 

"The microwave weaponry theory would be just as absurd as some of the other conspiracies if the Pentagon hadn’t been researching the possibility of using similar voice-projection technology in the past as a nonlethal weapon. According to one report on the project, such a weapon would create a condition similar to schizophrenia. “Application of the microwave hearing technology could facilitate a private message transmission. It may be useful to provide a disruptive condition to a person not aware of the technology. Not only might it be disruptive to the sense of hearing, it could be psychologically devastating if one suddenly heard ‘voices within one’s head.’” Of course, the chances of mental illness versus microwave mind control greatly favor the former."

Report: Nonlethal Weapons Could Target Brain, Mimic Schizophrenia | Danger Room | Wired.com: "a newly declassified Pentagon report, Bioeffects of Selected Non-Lethal Weapons , obtained by a private citizen under the Freedom of Information Act, provides some fascinating tidbits on a variety of exotic weapons ideas. Among those discussed are weapons that could disrupt the brain, as well as my longtime obsession, the "Voice of God" device, which creates voices in people’s heads...

If voices in your head aren’t disturbing enough, the report also goes on to theorize about a microwave weapon that could use electromagnetic pulses to disrupt the brain’s functioning. It would work through "a rhythmic-activity synchronization of brain neurons that disrupts normal cortical control of the corticospinal and corticobulbar pathways that disrupts normal functioning of the spinal motor neurons which control muscle and body movements."" 

Louis is a bit of a genius. - Louis C.K. slams smartphones: 

""I think these things are toxic, especially for kids," he said of phones on Thursday's Conan. "They don't look at people when they talk to them and they don't build empathy. You know, kids are mean, and it's 'cause they're trying it out. They look at a kid and they go, 'you're fat,' and then they see the kid's face scrunch up and they go, 'oh, that doesn't feel good to make a person do that.' But they got to start with doing the mean thing. But when they write 'you're fat,' then they just go, 'mmm, that was fun, I like that."

 He moved on to get philosophical about how adults are suffering from phone overuse, too.

"You need to build an ability to just be yourself and not be doing something. That's what the phones are taking away, is the ability to just sit there. That's being a person. Because underneath everything in your life there is that thing, that empty — forever empty. You know what I'm talking about? That knowledge that it's all for nothing and that you're alone.

...And sometimes when things clear away, you're not watching anything, you're in your car, and you start going, 'Oh no, here it comes. That I'm alone.' It's starts to visit on you. Just this sadness. Life is tremendously sad, just by being in it. That's why we text and drive. I look around, pretty much 100% of the people driving are texting. And they're killing, everybody's murdering each other with their cars. But people are willing to risk taking a life and ruining their own because they don't want to be alone for a second because it's so hard.""

"All of man's trouble stem from his inability to sit quietly in a room alone." - Blaise Pascal

Awesome cosplay - Karen--Kasumi (Karen Kasumi) on deviantART:

Today's Internets - "My breasts look amazing."

geeksofdoom: ‘RPG Lady Armor’ …when Truth &... - APE IN A CAPE:

They know what they did there.

Funny sloth tshirt trumps gratuitous breast shot, actually.

What in the unholy fuck was this guy thinking? - The Silent Castrati | Chateau Heartiste:
"Many of us have seen examples of this — the silent suffering of the married castrati — in our social circles...  No doubt the husband happily acquiesced to this fun game with his wife, only dimly aware of its dark intimations of his sacklessness...  Why do so many men willfully, even joyfully, put their balls in the vice? Why do they make a spectacle of their emasculation for the hoots and hollers of the entertained public? Why do they revel in their genital dispossession, like some psychologically cleaved Stockholm Syndrome sufferer?"


All of your excuses are completely invalid - Barbie Thomas: inspirational mother who lost her arms aged 2 is now a BODYBUILDER | Mail Online:
"A mother who lost both her arms from an electric shock as a toddler has found a love of bodybuilding. Barbie Thomas, 37, has been competing against able bodied women in bodybuilding for over a decade after a youth crammed full of dance, soccer and swimming competitions. The mother of two says there is little she cannot do. She shrugs off the amount of effort it takes to compete as a body builder and just like any other family, she says raising her two teenage sons is hard work..." 

Barb Thomas Has No Arms and Bodybuilds, What the Fuck Do You Do? | What Would Tyler Durden Do: 
"The story of Barb Thomas, the late 30-something body and fitness competition chick with no arms has been making the media rounds. It’s another one of these deeply inspirational stories that will mostly only make you feel like shit. When your old high school buddy who was always weaker than you tells you he’s now benching more than you at the gym, that’s inspirational. You get your fat ass back to the gym because you dominate that fucker. When a woman with zero arms is doing dead lifts with her shoulder nubs and opening car doors with her feet, that’s just deflating. You will never be as good as her. Never. Just sit on the couch and watch TV until you die. Good work, Barb."

Training.

9/20 - bench, dips, push-ups

ChAoS & PAIN: We're Killing These Shots Like RIP, And That's Why We Outlift The Straightedge Kids: 

"When asked why he drank so much beer, Schemansky had this to say, "Because fuck you, that's why." I could go on at some length, because I've frankly never met an elite lifter who didn't like to drink.  there's actually a reason for this- elite competitors are much more inclined to indulge in risk-taking behaviors than the average person (Jacobs).  Additionally, exercise and drinking are very positively correlated.  the more you drink, the more you exercise, and vice-versa.  Though scientists have no idea why this is, they do know that exercise mitigates the damage done to the brain in binge drinking, and that  "'drinking is associated with a 10.1 percentage point increase in the probability of exercising vigorously,' the authors write. More specifically, 'heavy drinkers exercise about 10 more minutes per week than current moderate drinkers and about 20 more minutes per week than current abstainers.' Meanwhile, the authors continue, 'an extra episode of binge drinking increases the number of minutes of total and vigorous physical activity per week for both women and men'" (Reynolds).

...there's nothing like a drunken, impromptu strongman competition to get the blood flowing."

Today's Internets - "Don't be mad, UPS is hiring..."

Throwback Thursday, Bitches - "Niggas is mad I get more butt than ashtrays, Fuck a fair one I get mine the fast way, Ski mask way nigga, ransom notes, Far from handsome, but damn a nigga tote...  You're mad cause my style you're admiring - Don't be mad, UPS is hiring..."

Craig Mack  - Flava In Ya Ear (Remix) by keyzz

Yeah, addiction is mostly bullshit.  As is the "War on Stuff That Makes You Feel Good That People Call Addiction." - Crack and meth addicts probably aren't as addicted as you think - Boing Boing:
 "Addiction — in the neuro-biological can't-get-enough-dopamine sense — might not be as powerful as pop culture would have us believe. A Columbia University psychology researcher has found that only about 20% of meth and crack users actually end up physiologically addicted. And, even those people are capable of making rational choices — including denying themselves a hit of their drug-of-choice in favor of a delayed monetary award. Based on his research, Carl Hart believes that drug use is merely a symptom of a life that's gone awry for other, more systemic, reasons."

Yeah, of course they did - DOJ Padded Number of Terrorism Convictions : Reason.com: 

"The Department of Justice has overstated the number of defendants who have been found guilty of terrorism-related crimes, according to an audit. Some were misreported. Some were counted more than once. Some even had their charges dismissed." -- Audit: Justice Dept. office overstated terrorism conviction statistics - The Washington Post

RIP - Famed boxer Ken Norton, who defeated Muhammad Ali, dies at age 70 - CNN.com: 

"Forty years after rising to the top of the boxing world and outdueling Muhammad Ali, Ken Norton lost his final fight -- a battle following a stroke -- at a Nevada medical facility, a friend said. He was 70 years old when he died Wednesday at a Veterans Affairs' medical facility in Henderson, Nevada, according to Gene Kilroy, who had managed Ali and more recently visited Norton as he recovered from a stroke. 

...the elder Norton was one of the most prominent figures in all of sports during the 1970s -- in large part because of his consistently great bouts with Ali. Their first showdown, in 1973, ended with Norton earning a split-decision victory -- and breaking Ali's jaw in the process..."

We live in the future, you know. - Scientists Have 3D-Printed Mini Human Livers for the First Time Ever: 

"Scientists at Organovo in San Diego have, for the very first time, been able to 3D print tiny replicas of human livers."

"I'm a bit fearful we're verging on what I call 'feelings territory.'" - "I'm not interested in caring about people."

34 Awesome Things Happening Behind The Scenes On "S.H.I.E.L.D.": 

"14. Kick ass ladies (and Master Simon Rhee)." 

[Master Simon Rhee the secret identity of Korean TKD "Best of the Best fighter" Dae Han Park.  Everybody knows that. - Rob] 

"4. Celebratory day drinking."

"13. Hulk hands." 

"21. LASER TAG BATTLES." 

"6. Strictly enforced rules." 

"33. Target practice."

Mike Tyson appears to be some kind of Shaolin Ninja of some sort.

Broken System/Why People Hate Lawyers - Attorney Sues Scientists Because Their Paper Made It Harder To Win Suits - Hit & Run : Reason.com: 

"If a scientific paper has made it harder to win lawsuits, what's an attorney to do? Why, sue the scientists and their publisher, of course."




"How are you?"

Encouraging Manatee is Encouraging. 

Awesome Ink.

Blazed Bareback Barbie: 

"“Every new country she goes to, she gets colored in. Epic”."

Training.

9/19 - squats, weighted hyperextensions, calf press

Food Log.

9/9 - coffee, milk, water, protein powder, Craze/Pump HD/1MR preworkout, pork chops, chocolate milk, butter, mayo, steak, eggs, avocado, ZMA

9/10 - coffee, milk, water, protein powder, Craze/Pump HD/1MR preworkout, pork chops, Animal Pak, Animal Flex, Animal Omega, Uni-Liver, coconut oil, butter, banana, eggs

9/11 - coffee, milk, water, bacon, protein powder, rice, beer, eggs, karaage, green chicken curry

9/12 - coffee, milk, water, protein powder, Craze/Pump HD/1MR preworkout, bacon, chocolate milk, peanut butter, banana, cheeseburgers, fries, Coke Zero

9/13 - coffee, milk, water, protein powder, 1MR preworkout, Coke Zero, banana, peanut butter, grilled chicken salad, blue cheese dressing, coconut oil, pork chops, chocolate cake, pizza

9/14 - coffee, milk, karaage, beer, cocktails, meat & bread plate, obscene amount of pizza

9/15 - coffee, milk, beer, tortillas, cheese, sour cream, Coke Zero, McDonald's burger/fries/nuggets/wings

9/16 - coffee, chocolate milk, water, 1MR preworkout, protein powder, milk, banana, Subway dbl roast beef & bacon sub, Animal Pak, Animal Flex, Animal Omega, Uni-Liver, ZMA

9/17 - coffee, chocolate milk, banana, water, 1MR preworkout, tortillas, protein powder, cheese, butter, ZMA, steak

Training.

9/18 - pushups, thoracic stretching, epsom salt bath

9/17 - press, Arnold press, Gironda swing, db shrugs, neck harness, neck nods/rotations, band face pull/pull aparts

9/16 - deadlift, seated row, pulldown, chins, 1a db row, concentration curls

9/15 & 15 - rest/weekend off

PR Friday – 13 SEP | 70's Big: 

"The process of training is grueling. It can be fun when training with friends, pumping loud music, having a grand ol’ time. But for most of us, we don’t get that luxury. We’re in a gym, a garage, or a “fitness adventure”…alone with our thoughts. There isn’t anyone there to encourage crushing the first set of squats or to hit a sixth snatch in a row. Each set, each rep requires that you make a decision: “Do I give it my all here?” Doing it on every rep isn’t easy.

It would be pretty easy to not try. It would be easy to slack on some reps, to not bounce the hell out of a squat or not finish the pull on your cleans. Sure, it’d be easy. It’d be so easy to quit. It’s much easier to quit than do something hard, so why bother?

Fuck. That. Never avoid doing something that’s hard. Avoiding “hard” makes you a coward, and you can never experience or learn anything by being a coward. By convincing yourself to do something that’s hard when you don’t want to, you won’t just grow physically. You display a quality of strength that correlates and resonates far beyond the barbell. By overcoming the difficult, that process sets you up for success. Your thoughts formulate your feelings, your feelings compose your emotions, your emotions are exhibited through your actions, and your actions define who you are. By structuring your thoughts to tackle difficult challenges, to strive towards success regardless of the obstacle, you formulate into a better person."

Today's Internets - router's working again, back to fact-checking the internet.

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal:

Schneier on Security: The Limitations of Intelligence: 

"We recently learned that US intelligence agencies had at least three days' warning that Syrian President Bashar al-Assad was preparing to launch a chemical attack on his own people, but wasn't able to stop it...

The NSA's belief that more data is always good, and that it's worth doing anything in order to collect it, is wrong. There are diminishing returns, and the NSA almost certainly passed that point long ago. But the idea of trade-offs does not seem to be part of its thinking. The NSA missed the Boston Marathon bombers, even though the suspects left a really sloppy Internet trail and the older brother was on the terrorist watch list. With all the NSA is doing eavesdropping on the world, you would think the least it could manage would be keeping track of people on the terrorist watch list. Apparently not. I don't know how the CIA measures its success, but it failed to predict the end of the Cold War. More data does not necessarily mean better information..."

Roppongi’s Golden Arches Crushed In The War Dance? McSayonara After 30 Years : Japan Subculture Research Center: 
"Let’s start with the obvious answer: it really is against the law to dance after midnight in most venues in Japan. This is well explained in the book Odotte wa Ikenai Kuni, Nihon (Japan: The Land Where You Can’t Dance) . The Adult Entertainment Laws originally were revised after WWII to clamp down on the infamous “Dance Halls” which were thinly disguised venues of prostitution. Several decades later “Dance Halls” have been replaced by clubs, discos, and bars with dance floors; they are not proxy brothels. The places people dance have changed, as have the customers; the laws have not...

One unofficial answer from the police is this: “It’s much easier to raid a dance club on violations of the AEL than it is to get a warrant for a drug search. Dance clubs are hotbeds of drug activity.” Maybe, that’s partially true. At some dance parties, there will be people using ecstasy (MDMA). There will also be people getting so drunk that they get alcohol poisoning. There will also be people just dancing. Should the rest of us be banned from the dance floor because of a few reckless people?

...The hardline enforcement of forgotten laws may make the police look good. It is a nuisance for everyone else. It hurts the business of legitimate clubs. It discourages people from staying out late, making nightlife boring. If there’s no place to dance after midnight, than many people will go home. It’s bad for tourism as well. “Tokyo: The City That Always Sleeps Before Midnight”—try attracting people to Japan with that slogan. Ultimately, it hurts the economy and encourages corruption. Clubs relying on late-night traffic will go out of business. Clubs that want to stay in business will pay bribes and protection money to avoid the raids."

RAWIllumination.net: Jesse Walker on Illuminatus!: 

Pic via Chapter37 on deviantART:

"The great thing about that book, which is in  my book -- People sometimes say it treats every conspiracy as true.  It might be more accurate to say that it treats every way at looking at the world as equally true and equally absurd, and then sort of sees what it can tease out from that.  Those two, particularly Wilson, represent what I call in the book the ironic style of political paranoia, or the ironic style of conspiracism, I should say. 

That's people who, they're not interested so much in talking about conspiracy theories to debunk them, or to say hey this is one that I think that is true, although sometimes they might do that their own merits,  but just to have fun with them, to explore them.  They're this big mutant mythology. Let's find what kind of laughs we can find in there. Let's find what kind of social insights can be found in there."

Dedroidify: He-he: 

Bruce Lee was cooler than you are.

Best thing you'll watch all day - "I've been around more corners of the internet than I feel comfortable admitting and though it's, yes, mostly just absolutely devastated me in a profound way, it's also let me stumble upon a few uplifting gems...  Also, we get to watch Mr. Rogers breakdance."

Via Dedroidify: 4 Awesome Videos That Make You Happy to Be Alive: 

"like you don't know, you stud, you irreplacable fucking hero." lmao"

Czech Republic sounds magical - Krauser's PUA Adventure: 

"Today’s czech mainstream media article on the most credible and popular portal idnes.cz( also most popular serious newspaper) – women’s section, written by a woman.(!) “What men desire?” 1) Attraction – men are very visual. 2) Femininity – in behaviour and in appearance. 3) Chemistry – nice parfume, sending sparking(?) signals, rest is nature 4) Positive approach to life 5) Active approach to life (Appreciate his ideas!) 6) Woman tinier than man. For many men she has to be skinny or normal, not fat or “unhealthy” thin. 7)Real partner – sharing daily trouble and fun, cuddling, you have to appreciate him for details 8) Sense for family, tenderness, empathy – Traditional role divison had and has it’s meaning. 9) Not dominant woman – even successful women should be “cool” at home. Men fight at work, they don’t want to fight at home as well. Main thing is not to piss him off! 10) Smile. Banal but magical...

Btw some gems from the discussion under the article: Woman: I though they wanted deaf nympho with big tits who owns a brewery and a fishing boat:D Woman: If man remembers colour of your eyes after first date, it means you have small tits. Man: 11. Swallow ."