"A British hard-partying 24-year-old bartender got upset that his elderly neighbour called the cops over all the noise he was making, so he got drunk and broke into the 72-year-old's house, wielding some kind of Mall Ninja knife that incorporated brass knuckles. What he didn't know was that the neighbour was a retired boxing champ, and the older man beat the everloving crap out of the would-be assailant.
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