"Sobriety and scholarly. Those are your problems."

Aren't they though?

Wednesday One-Liners Are a Real Page-Turner

NYU bimbette to studious friend: Your problem is that you read for all your classes. Sobriety and scholarly. Those are your problems.

--Starbucks, W 4th St

Overheard by: wine girl

Book-hawking hobo: ... And this is my new book, 'If You Don't Beat Your Children, They'll End Up Like Me'!

--6 train

Overheard by: Zarek

via Overheard in New York, Jan 23, 2008

Skanktacular Wednesday One-Liners

Girl to friend: It's like that saying, you know? 'The pot calling the kettle a slut.'

--W 63rd St

Overheard by: JustVisiting

Woman to table of people: ... Although I'm pretty sure it says 'slut' in my medical file...

--Rolf's, 22nd & 3rd

Overheard by: Ladle

JAP: You can't put a price on casual sex.

--110th & Broadway

Female employee on break, to man: I'm what's called a nymphomaniac. I'll do it anywhere -- on the bus, the train, in the bathroom, in Chick-Fil-A...

--NYU dining hall

Chick on cell: So yeah -- now I have to see this guy on Monday and work with him. I never work with him, but the minute I bone him, now I get to work with him. It's like the walk of shame drawn out for days... Hey, I can't help it if this keeps happening to me... I guess I need to not get drunk and screw my coworkers.

--89th & Columbus

Overheard by: Lala

College girl to friends: I guess you could say it was a friends with benefits sort of thing, except that we only slept together.

--Columbus Circle subway exit

Overheard by: confused by the definition

via Overheard in New York, Jan 23, 2008

Says So on Her T-Shirt

Chick: Richard, I felt bad about what I said when I realized that Natia was sitting right next to me.
Richard: What did you say, Natalie?
Natalie: I said, 'I'm sick and tired of these terrorists.'
Richard: It's okay, Natalie. Natia is a Muslim, not a terrorist.

--Park Ave

via Overheard in New York, Jan 22, 2008

When Was the Last Time You Got 20 Years for Jaywalking?

Guy: Statutory rape is the jaywalking of sex crimes!

Interbay Golf
Seattle, Washington

via Overheard Everywhere, Jan 23, 2008