Monday, March 26, 2007

Superheroes, written in the style of...

Brilliantly funny concept. Literary comic book mash up. Comics characters written in the style of famous writers... challenge thrown out by one blogger, picked up by about a dozen.

Lurking Rhythmically: Batman, as written by Chuck Palahniuk:
"Stabbing into the sky like a mile-long phosphorescent penis is the Bat-Signal, my emblem embossed across the clouds like a serial killer's trophy mark. 'Fetishistic' isn't the right word, but it's the closest that comes to mind.

I am Bruce's rampaging ego.

The Batmobile rips through Gotham's steel canyons, belching smoke as thick as my rage and and black as my mood, my foot permanently against the firewall. More speed, more power, more penetration of the murky streets. I have an erection as hard as iron and I can't satisfy it, so my Batmobile becomes my penis, plowing through moist and cloying alleys like a turbine-powered dildo.

It's always "a" dildo, though. Never "my" dildo."

Worth clicking over and reading in full, if only so you can see how skillfully the phrase "Bukkake of Justice" can be effectively worked into writing.

Same writer did the also impressive Iron Man, as written by William Gibson:
He swallowed a handful of Etinol, the large white pentagonal pills bitter in his mouth before being washed down by the taste of Goldschläger.

The smart drugs took effect almost immediately, 3000 milligrams of genetically-tailored Acetylcholine blasting through his nervous system like a hot desert wind through Martian box canyons. Blood flow to his brain improved, ATP production increased, oxygen and iron in his blood bound with greater efficiency.

...Theoretical armor, he had first called it, because armor that never took a hit was useless weight. Better, he thought, to have a suit that existed only in mathematical theory until such time as he actually needed it, and then only in the sections where it was needed. The quantum nature of being in a state of existence-yet-nonexistence until it was observed to be necessary was what gave it its final name. "Fly," he said, or at least thought he said, and decided that boot jets were necessary.

GRAVITON EMITTERS ACTUALIZED.

Though I've got to say, my favorite is probably Jimmy: The True Story of a Teenage Journalist by Kevin Church over at BeaucoupKevin.com.



Go to any of the links to find more mashup awsomeness.

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